Just Amleth

Sunday, November 02, 2003

Eating hamsters - Part III

To all hamster lovers out there: I'd like to emphasize that the essence of the article is not just about the eating of hamsters described in graphic detail. The theme of this article is the redemption of humanity -- my redemption. As with all struggles in the history of humanity, the path to redemption is fraught with peril, and many lives (hamsters, that is) have to be lost before one can finally transcend one's humanity and attain near-perfection.

This continues from the immediate aftermath of the events described in
Eating hamsters - Part II

I was determined not to make eating hamsters a way of life. My heart ached when I saw the sad look in the mother's eyes and the resigned look on the father's face. I could not face the hamster's mother and father without remembering my sin, so I promptly gave them away. Now that I have the blood of two hamsters on my hands, I made a solemn promise to myself that I would never again, go out of the way to murder a hamster due to a lack of control over my appetite.

The mother had two other babies, one male and one female, which I named Jim and Kelly. Upon seeing the two new baby hamsters that I had brought forth into this world, I was comforted. After all, isn't there a phrase "an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth"? Soon, I will be able to return both eye and tooth, and atone for my sin.

I fed the hamsters on a diet of carrots, greens, and some bean curd as a protein supplement. This suited me just fine, as I liked eating such food myself, so it was hardly any trouble for me to prepare food for the hamsters. About two months passed, and the baby hamsters grew and matured into fine adults. I was happy at the sight of the two new hamsters I now had. I was determined to give them the best lives a hamster could ever dream to have. They had nice, cosy cushions for beds. I did not cage them. I gave them absolute freedom to roam about the apartment.

One morning, I decided to make carrot juice. After depositing the carrots in the blender, I realized that there was not enough carrots to make juice for both the hamsters and myself. There was a Cold Storage supermarket near where I lived, so I decided to go there to acquire some carrots. I was only going to be away for a short while, so I left the carrots in the blender as I went out. Kelly was still asleep. Jim, however was already up, and I could tell he was hungry. He looked at me with such longing eyes that my heart softened for him. "I'll be back soon with your breakfast," I said smilingly as I kissed him goodbye and left the apartment.

Upon my return, Kelly had already awakened and greeted me cheerfully. Jim was however, nowhere to be seen. Jimmy always enjoyed playing hide and seek, so his dissapearance did not really concern me. "Look at what I have got for you!" I brought the carrots out and dangled them before Kelly, placing it on the ground before her. Kelly tried to munch the carrots through the plastic but she was unable to make any progress. "Relax, I will prepare it for you the way you like it", I said soothingly as I stroked her fur.

I brought the carrots to the sink, peeled their skins and put them into the blender. It was then, that I thought I saw the carrots in my blender moving. I blinked my eyes several times. The carrots were there as usual, motionless as carrots should be. "It must have been my imagination," I thought. I had not been getting much sleep in the last few nights, and the lack of sleep must be taking its toll on me. I covered the blender with a plastic cover, and then switched it on. There was a screeching sound quite uncharacteristic of the blender, but it only lasted for a few seconds before the familiaring whirring sound of the blender returned. "Perhaps the blender's getting old," I thought to myself.

After the blender had spinned for a while, I switched the blender off and emptied its contents into a bowl. The carrot juice seemed a little redder than usual, almost crimson. I must have gotten really fresh carrots today! "Jimmy, where are you?" I called out. When Jimmy did not appear, I poured some carrot juice into Kelly's bowl. Kelly lapped the juice hungrily, but stopped before she had finished the whole bowl. I had a nickname for her, "Kelly the Glutton", so this refusal to eat was quite unusual of her. "Come on, I know you're hungry, take some more," I coaxed her. She remained steadfast in her refusal.

Sighing, I drank my portion of the carrot juice. It tasted a little different than usual. A slightly bitter, rusty iron taste mixed with carrot is what I would call it. Somehow, it tasted better than the usual carrot juice. "So this is what fresh carrots taste like," I thought to myself. I had almost finished drinking the whole concoction until I chanced upon what tasted like hair. Spitting it out, I saw that it was short and white. My hair was not white, of that I'm sure. I felt a sudden chill in my spine.

"Jimmy, Jimmy, where are you?" I cried frantically. There was no response. Then I saw the sad look in Kelly's eyes as she stared at her bowl, and then back at me. I looked into my cup. All that remained was white fur mixed with some carrot crumbs.

What have I done again?!